Sunday, April 15, 2012

St Simons Island 2012

First vacation as a family of 3.

Felt a bit fuzzy and a whole lot of surreal. The struggle to keep myself moving (albeit slowly and sadly at moments) along is very real unfortunately. Baby steps, I'm told.

And still we had a good time. Linley tried and liked fried calamari and butter pecan french toast. We swam often. There were piers to walk and lighthouses to climb and bike trails to explore. My Linley is a joy to be around and I noticed her sweet demeanor accentuated. She has always been my independent little one and she is not typically a touchy girl... Have I mentioned that she is very much like her mother?

She is.

But on this vacation we noticed her reaching for my hand when walking along. Linley was content to cuddle up with us and watch television. She never asked me to stop touching her fuzzy head or stroke her face and I truly think she just knew mommy needed a little extra of her. I also think that Linley just needed a little extra of me and Chad.

While I know how much my girls adored each other, Linley was very often gently nudged out of the way. All of her needs were met but too often her wants went overlooked...and while I know this may not seem like the end of the world, it's not really fair to have this be the normal for over two years.

This vacation, while having its share of tears and sadness, was a time to refocus on Linley. She's now an only child and this was never my intention when I first began bearing children. But instead of thinking on the whys and how's of the past few years we chose to hope and plan for a future.

Linley is worth it.

This vacation was a wonderful reminder of who we each are to each other... A family.

I love you Linley.
And I miss you Piper.

9 comments:

  1. And you do, all three of you, have a hope in the things unseen. So glad you got to spend some time away from the 'everyday'. Memories you will always have. Praying for you.

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  2. Sending you all prayers as you continue to navigate these moments without your sweet Piper.

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  3. Still praying for you and your family. I am happy that the three of you got to have this time together. Your are all in my thoughts.

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  4. Linley is such a beautiful little girl. Her sweet spirit is just evident right there on her sun kissed face! So glad that you got some R & R... and that you are getting this awesome quality time with one another.

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  5. The fight was not in vain. We struggle not against flesh and blood but principalities and powers and rulers of the darkness of this world. What you, Chad and Linley have fought for is love and that breaks every chain.

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  6. So glad you were able to get away, you all needed some rest and relaxation!
    Praying everyday for your family.

    Jackie

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  7. Sus, my name's Caroline--we met at church about a month or so ago; I'm becoming a member of Redeemer on Sunday and I wanted y'all to know I love you guys! St. Simons is one of my favorite places to be; I went there all the time as a little girl and have some very fond memories of enjoying St. Simons with just Mom and Dad and me :) Hope you all had a restful time. Oh--and the picture of Linley blowing a kiss is simply precious <3 <3

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  8. Praying for continued grace and peace. And blessings...praying for many, many blessings!!

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  9. I've been thinking about you all. I wish there was something profound for me to say but I just feel sadness. I pray but honestly it's hard to know what to pray. Still, though, I pray for all three of you and will continue to do so as often as God brings you to my mind. If I could say one thing that comes to my mind when I pray for you all, though, it's that God continually reminds me of how much He loves you all. I know that He is near in the pain and I pray that He will protect you and comfort you through this deep longing for Piper.
    Whenever you're ready, send me an email and I'd love to have you and Linley over so that she can play with Hannah & Lilly. We can drink coffee and hang out while they play American Girl dolls. We're just down 78 from you and I would really love to see you whenever you're ready and need a friend to hang out with. I'll even check my email regularly to make sure I don't miss you! cookjaimer@gmail.com

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