Piper fought off the paralytic medication a little earlier. Nurse Karen was fixing Pipers ART line in her left wrist and told me that Piper was jerking a little... When she was retaping her back up, Piper wrapped her fingers around Karens hand and held on. I quickly called Chad and I grabbed the other hand and we all spent about 5 or 6 minutes talking with a semi responsive Piper...it was beautiful. She nodded when we asked if she knew we loved her and was trying to form words around the tube as we sang to her...she agreed to listening to Annie tomorrow as well as watching Barbie with Linley. Her eyes fluttered against the cream they use to keep them moist and we were able to see glinpses of the sweet blue shes been forced to hid. When we told her she needed to take another nap, she shook her head. The entire time we were next to her we were able to feel her fingers grasp our own and we were able to see her body attempt to participate...the girl still has her vim and vinegar.
I'm thrilled to have had this with Piper. The decision to sedate and vent Piper was made so quickly I didn't have a chance to tell her what was going on and I could never have had enough time to feel her respond to my touch. Having this episode, while never the normal and surely not the most safe thing, made me cry anew. We were able to explain that she was getting sleepy medicine, that mommy and daddy were always next to her and that we all missed her dearly. And she was able to show us that she heard our love and that we are still her comfort.
As it should be.
Nothing made my day any better. And despite the continual bad news we receive this moment was given to us. I continue to pray for more moments...for a life together and more chances to squeeze hands and verbalize the fact that we all love each other so very much.
Her paralytic medication has been bumped up, we can't have Piper fighting off the ventilator. But while they can keep her from telling me she loves me no one will be able to keep me from telling her I love her...or take those beautiful moments away.
I praise God for this and I praise God for the one nurse we have had in 5 days here in the ICU who was able to simply say "this is good for you all" and walked put of the room and allowed us this time. Thank you Lord and Karen.