Thursday, March 8, 2012


Both my girls are currently obsessed with the movie Annie. Linley received it for her birthday and she has quickly leaned all the songs and even breaks out some sweet orphaned little girl moves...and Piper just wants to be like her sister so she also is digging Annie.

And all day I have seen Linley belt out lyrics and tonight I was singing Tomorrow to Piper as I scratched her back and wooed her into a nights sleep and I realized I didn't truly know the words. Thankfully my two year old didn't care though I am certain Linley would notice right off the bat.

Now that Piper is snoozing I am searching the lyrics and loving them.

"the sun will come out tomorrow
Betcha bottom dollar that tomorrow
There will be sun

Just thinking bout tomorrow
Clears away the cobwebs & sorrows
Till there's none

When I am stuck in a day
That's gray and lonely
I just stick out my chin and grin
And say...

The sun will come out tomorrow
So you got to hang on till tomorrow
Come what may!
Tomorrow! Tomorrow!
I love you...tomorrow
You're only a day away."

Now, lest anyone think I am remotely as cute as Annie or either of my daughters while singing this, please know that only Piper encourages my singing and Linley has begun to look mortified when I do more than hum.

Thankfully for me, my maternal grandmother taught my own mother that "if you can't sing well...sing loud"

So we all do. And often.

And if these are the currently cool words to sing in my home I will hope that the girls both take them to heart and find the joy and optimism in looking ahead a little bit. In this ghastly world of cancer, so often we are told to focus on today... And while I think that is a necessary mindset to have to survive when the battle drones on, I also think that we as humans need to know that something is always around the corner... And we need to hope its good and worth waiting for.

Maybe that's just me.

Though I really doubt I am alone.

Now our personal Tomorrow will hopefully consist of discharging this joint. Granted we are really only moving across the parking lot but we will have locks on the doors and the ability to walk around without socks should we so desire. With this freedom comes a long list of medications and tpn and heightened responsibility that we are quite ready to work out.

The Natural Killer Cell infusion happened today around 5:15 and it was as anticlimactic as we anticipated. The actual syringe was only 10 ml in volume but was packed with several million of my natural killer cells...hopefully they are as pissed off at leukemia as I am. There was a room full if medical staff watching her vitals and a wall full of emergency response medication should something arise. Thankfully, the infusion went without problem though her heart rate and blood pressure today has been elevated and her oxygen has needed help... Not that she cares as she is acting just fine and happy. They continue to watch her closely.

Thus, we have Tomorrow. Im looking forward to it because sometimes living life a day at a time makes me feel stagnant and heaven only knows that looking backwards is the quickest way to emotionally run amuck...

So, tomorrow we keep our eyes on you.

And we sing. Loudly and badly.


  1. When Piper is cured and your life is "normal", and you have time on your hands, you need to put all your blogs together and have them published as a book because it is some of the best reading I have ever read. It never fails to move me and make me laugh or cry and always to reflect. I only know a small portion of what you are going through but so many times, I want to just write "ditto what she said". Through your writing, you are allowing us into your world no matter how good or bad or beautiful or ugly. Thank you for that. I hope you know that you have truly touched so many lives by sharing Piper and Linley and your lives with us. I pray so hard for a good and wonderful ending to your book.

  2. I love y'all! still praying for a miracle for your sweet Piper!! xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

  3. One of the highlights of my year thus far was watching Piper sing along to the bath video on the iPhone. It was as cute as the laughing babies. Anyway, I bet a video of Linley and Piper singing Tomorrow would be awfully cute to watch.

    Love and prayers and smiles,

  4. I have stumbled upon (although we all should know it's Gods plan) your blog. Found you on a friend of a friends blog link. I just want you to know, there are probably several of us out there, not knowing you personally, but knowing you thru your eloquent and honest posts. God bless you. As a mother of two healthy boys, although one with special needs, I am so humbled. My heart and fervent prayers are yours, Pipers, Linley's. I am praying for a miracle. I am praying as a mother who can only imagine. I just want you to know you have prayer warriors out there.

  5. I ate a butterscotch snack pack at work last night and thought of you ;) I'm praying for y'all daily and I am thrilled to hear that the infusion went smoothly! Lots of love, 'Eee"

  6. oh Susanna How I love you and our lack of skills in that department only means we are gifted in others...
    P.S. have i told you how much you mean to me lately?