And let me tell you what, it is getting pretty pathetic. I have been going to this Bible Study on Tuesday mornings for 3 reasons:
1) God misses me and I miss Him
2) Free childcare with workers who have the patience to deal with Piper
3) Its about the book of Job and suffering and I have heard through the grapevine that even Christians may face suffering. (gasp.)
And I love the study and the ladies and the lovely breakfast table and not changing diapers and having adult conversations and all that jazz. I really do.
BUT. BUT. BUT.
I spend the better part of the hour and a half staring at the rafters, checking out the breakfast table, avoiding eye contact and gnawing the heck out of my tongue. Why? Because otherwise I cry. So far I have been able to be all ladylike and dainty about the tears that slip out but today I toed the line of falling on my face sobbing like a child. I believe I have mentioned before my aversion to tears and all things emotional. (gasp. again.)
Oh the tears.
Oh the snot.
Oh the stuttering.
Oh the horror of being caught being human.
No harm done. Except to my pride and my mascara.
And the ladies in my small group all watch helplessly and I want to be all, "This is sort of my Tuesday gig" or "I penciled this in on the schedule so don't you fret about it" Poor, poor ladies didn't know what they were getting into having me join them. I hope I don't get kicked out for excessive sobbing.
So THAT was fun.
And so if you were to ask me how Piper's eating was going, or how my marriage is suffering or how much I am missing Linley while she is in school or how many hours of sleep a night I am getting...well, pay attention to my jaw line. Its probably working on my tongue and the tears they may be a-coming. But its okay so long as its a Tuesday. Now, on Wednesday I put my big girl panties on and deal with things a little better. So schedule your questions accordingly, my dear friends.
It's nice to hear you've joined the human race! ...Hi I'm Susanna, not always superwoman, but I sure as anything am going to try...
ReplyDeleteI love you!
i am so glad i am not the only one who cries on tuesdays :) you are not alone! it is so great to see you on tuesdays, by the way.
ReplyDeleteOnly on Tuesdays?? You, go, girl! -Becki
ReplyDeleteoh Susanna........... I'm so glad you've found this Bible study! You need it! P.S. you can cry more than just on Tuesday, youknow :)
ReplyDelete